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College Bound – Protecting Our Daughters – The 4 A’s of Self Defense
As babies, we held them in our arms when they were babies. We kissed them, nursed them, watched over them, encouraged them, supported them, loved them as they grew and matured and… protected them. As loving parents, protecting our children is not only our duty, it is our passion. But how do we protect them when we are physically separated from them and they from us?
How do we ensure their safety in a world that is becoming crazier, crazier, more unstable and more dangerous by the day, the Georgia Tech Massacre of April 16, 2007, in which 33 people, mostly college students, died, a horrific, heartbreaking event that claimed the unwanted title of America’s Modern the deadliest mass shooting in history? Although our little girls are capable and mature women, even mothers, they will always be our children, and our hearts can never be removed from the anxiety to protect them and keep them safe and out of harm’s way.
I remember when both my daughters went to college. It was a transformative experience. All grown up, leaving home and ready to take on the world, they were still more vulnerable than they knew, but I knew that despite their comforting, parting words, “Don’t worry, Dad. I’ll be fine.” As parents, we pray, “okay.”
Here are some shocking thoughts from OnlineLawyerSource.com:
1. “Sexual assault statistics, including among female students, have been the subject of several studies. In a 1988 national survey of 32 college campuses, one in four students were found to have been the victim of rape or attempted rape. Some studies have suggested sexual assault statistics among college students are so high because of the role of alcohol and drugs. Many women believe that sexual assault against a person cannot be reported if they have been drinking or intoxicated, but this is not true. Sexual assault is a crime, and being drunk does not mean that the law no longer applies. “
2. “Sexual violence statistics show that 17 percent of reported incidents against women resulted in injured victims. 1992 National Victim Center and Crime Victims Research and Treatment Center sexual violence statistics report that 80 percent of sexual violence survivors knew their assailant at least by sight. Sexual Violence the impact can be physically, psychologically and emotionally damaging, and denial is particularly strong for victims who knew their attacker.”
So how do we protect our children, especially our daughters, when they are at school and away from home, helping to secure their peace of mind and our own? One way is to give them the gift of a women’s self-defense workshop. Our girls are more likely to be attacked, assaulted and possibly raped when they are alone, perhaps walking around their dorm in the evening, shopping, or even studying in a remote library. There will be times when they will be alone… and potentially vulnerable.
Vulnerable if they don’t have the skills to defend themselves. The reality is that women who fight back when attacked have a greater chance of survival than those who don’t. Predators prey on the weak, not the strong. When predators encounter a fearsome enemy, they move on to another, weaker prey. We give our girls the gift of empowerment through women’s self-defense classes to help them protect themselves when we can’t. After all, as our children grow into adults, it is their responsibility to protect themselves. Getting them to learn martial arts or attending a self-defense workshop (perhaps with mom) designed specifically for women is one way to help them help themselves. It is also one way we as loving parents can help ensure the safety of our beloved sons and daughters, especially when they are studying.
As a professional martial arts instructor and owner of my own karate studio for over 30 years, here are some valuable tips that can help anyone protect their life:
The right mindset is crucial to survival. We call this self-defense 4.
1.Awareness. Don’t be careful, be aware. Awareness is crucial wherever you are. It is also important to know who is watching you? If you’re in a grocery store, a gas station, a department store, a park, wherever – always be aware of your surroundings. This is your first line of defense.
2. Stance – In order to survive, you must have a survival attitude, having made the choice beforehand that you will fight to survive and not just give in to your attacker’s demands. Be like the sun – life gives warmth, but scorching if someone gets too close. Another simile is to be like a lion – loving her cubs unless someone tries to hurt them and at which point she becomes a vicious opponent. Also remember that you are not a victim. Your attacker is the victim. Toss an attack coin. Attack your attacker. Finally, you must have the eternal will to survive. If your opponent’s will to hurt you is stronger than your will to live or stay safe, your chances of winning are not good. In an attack situation, your will to survive trumps everything else.
3. Aggression – Passivity in physical abuse is a recipe for violence or worse. In the early, non-physical part of a potential situation, passivity may be called for, but if the action turns physical, combat – and aggressiveness in combat – is the means of survival. The famous General George Patton said, “In war, the only true defense is offense.”
He was absolutely right. From my professional perspective and tens of thousands of hours of teaching self defense over all my decades of teaching, your chances of winning are much better when you attack. You have more options and a practically infinite number of features. However, the defensive position is limited and the chances of defeat increase because when we defend, we become reactive and action is always faster than reaction. Therefore, we must be very proactive and aggressive if we choose to survive a physical attack.
4. Accuracy – These are defensive skills that include finger jabs, stabs and claws to your opponent’s eyes; also punching him in the eyes or face, especially using a double palm strike under the chin; knee strikes or kicks to the groin or knees. Taking a self-defense class at a local and reputable self-defense studio will be of great help.
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