Can A 1 And A Half Year Old Have Crab Love Energy – Apathy and How to Reverse It

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Love Energy – Apathy and How to Reverse It

Relationships that lead to marriage usually begin with intense love and romance. It’s so wonderful that people start wanting more, but as soon as they want more, it goes away because you can’t get Happiness. It is the by-product of the gift.

When people start wanting more, it becomes like shopping at the supermarket. Soon they want more for less, and the relationship becomes needs-based. Everyone begins to demand more and give less. Eventually, one or the other’s needs are hurt, causing one to pull away, and then we have distance and apathy.

So the energy shifts from moving outward to moving inward to go nowhere as the relationship shifts from love of need to apathy. These three steps are equivalent to going from hot to cold to lukewarm.

There is a formula to bring this back to intense romance once again. This formula is to trigger the need, but avoid all hurt and jealous feelings.

This can be applied to the relationship that has become needs-oriented or even distant and apathetic. Here, one of the two must take a step towards independence, but without causing pain or jealousy. It is important to arouse only the interest which is the attention directed by the apathetic. This attention directed outwards becomes love as long as hurt and jealous feelings are not triggered.

For example, a couple had been married for forty years and the wife decided that was long enough. She had put together a shopping list of everything she found wrong with marriage, and she decided to move out. Both were firm believers in one marriage, and neither would break marriage vows or have an affair, so it wasn’t a concern for either of them. Nevertheless, the husband was very upset about the separation.

This man really liked to dance, so I suggested he ask his ex-wife if she would mind if he joined a dance club, a group of people who went to different places every week just to socialize and dance . He really didn’t need her permission because she had already chosen to leave him, but it was essential for him to get her to say everything was fine because her permission reduces or eliminates jealousy and anger on her part. . He explained to her how lonely he felt for human companionship, and she agreed to him pursuing his newfound interest.

Ever since she agreed to the arrangement, she couldn’t feel hurt, jealous or angry. Often he invited her to come. He was very affectionate and gregarious, and at the dances he made sure that none of the women were left out. If a lady hadn’t been asked to dance, he’d be sure to ask her.

One evening, his wife ends up agreeing to accompany him to a ball. She watched in amazement as one woman after another asked her to dance, and several told her how lucky she was to have him as a husband. Her interest in him soon returned. That was many years ago, and today they live together as a very happy couple.

This approach was learned partly through a dream, concerning a very difficult therapeutic situation that was about to lead to divorce. In the mid-1970s, while I was sleeping, I received information that the situation would resolve itself because it would prove what was written in the Gita, in terms of the three Gunas: Sattva, Rajas and Tamas. Sattva is the highest level, followed by Rajas, then Tamas. I equate Sattva with love, or outward flowing energy; Rajas with need or desire, or self-returning energy; and Tamas with apathy, or no energy going anywhere. There are also biblical references to this. Christ referred to preferring people who are hot or cold, but certainly not lukewarm. Tamas is the lowest of the three Gunas. I liken it to apathy or lukewarmness.

In the Gita it is said that the road from Tamas to Sattva sometimes goes through Rajas, or said in English, the road from apathy to love sometimes goes through need. I realized then that it is possible to instantly convert people from apathy to love by triggering the need but avoiding hurt or jealous feelings. It is possible to take the most distant and apathetic need for a relationship but avoid pain or feelings of jealousy-and thus precipitate intense feelings of love and romance.

This is perhaps the formula the Lord uses in the book of Revelations and in several places in the Old Testament. When people see utter devastation and carnage, terrors beyond imagination, they become afraid of losing their lives (need) and then turn their attention to God (outward directed energy); and as they think of Him, their need begins to turn to love and appreciation.

This modality of treatment requires much more explanation than we have space for in this book, but it has saved many marriages that were doomed.

Another example is that of a sixty-year-old librarian who was married to a man who belonged to half a dozen organizations and was president of several of them. She could go to meetings with him, but she felt ignored and completely excluded from his life. I suggested that she become more independent, go places and do things on her own; but she should let him know that she really cared about him, that he was number 1 in her life and that she preferred to be with him. There are many social clubs such as dance clubs, bird watching groups, book clubs, etc. and she could ask if it would be okay if she joined one of them. I told him to preface any question with “Do you mind if…” and that would generate interest, but shouldn’t cause jealousy. I also suggested that he think about this for a few weeks and put it in his own words.

The next morning, as he hid behind the newspaper and drank a cup of coffee, she said, “Bill, would you mind if I had an affair?” He spilled his coffee all over her forehead, but the next week, he took her on a tropical vacation to the Bahamas.

If she had said, “You’re not paying attention to me, so I’m going to have an affair,” she would have instead aroused pain, jealousy, and anger; and the result would have been quite the opposite.

This is not a recommendation for risky behavior. This extreme example is used to illustrate this elusive flow of love energy; and the powerful dynamic of how to take the lukewarm person, trigger the need, but avoid hurt or jealous feelings and thus propel the person into powerful feelings of love. Any move towards independence can serve the same purpose.

Sigmund Freud, in The I and the Id, wrote that the effectiveness of the therapy of the future could depend mainly on the mobilization of energy. It mobilizes energy.

When you understand the flow of love energy, you can actually redirect it. To help someone recover from a serious illness, ask that person to help someone else or others with the same illness. One of my AIDS patients saw a substantial improvement in his condition when he started counseling people in the hospital who were dying of the disease. Circulate the patient’s energy outward, ask the patient to help others, and encourage the person’s spiritual practices. Here, you may need to redirect the person from “give me, give me, give me” prayers to an “I love you, I love you, I love you” type of prayer.

Fear is the antithesis of love, and it is counterproductive. It focuses attention and energy on oneself. Imagining oneself healthy, the body free from disease, knowing and believing that it is so, and helping others to recover – perhaps from similar problems – is much more productive. For the healing process, it is important to avoid hatred, bitterness, unforgiveness, worry and instead focus on intensifying love, care and action for the others without regard for

anything in return. Maximum enhancement comes from the expression of devotional love and appreciation. All of this increases the life force, the healing energy and the recovery process.

On closer inspection, this loving energy continues to follow definite laws which are like other laws of physics and which are quantitative. Of all the things to study in medicine today, it is the analysis of love energy itself that could be the most rewarding and productive. It is this energy of love that I hope to devote much of the rest of my life to. It’s probably the most important healing and longevity factor since Hans Selye discovered stress, and it’s just as invisible as stress was in the early 20th century.

As an aside, there is a growing awareness of the absolute importance of hitting the bull’s eye and directing love to God. It really improves the flow of love energy because we are not holding ourselves back for fear of rejection. We begin to imitate love at its source, and we begin to experience a multiplicity of blessings, which further magnifies our love. The great commandment—to love God with all our heart, mind, and soul—is a commandment of mercy and compassion, for nothing instills more joy and more blessings.

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