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Healthy Tips for Steady Love Relationship, "Husband, Love Your Wife, Wife, Love Your Husband…"
Note these 3 sentences. I used to share the following sentences with my friends…
 “True love is long-suffering, patient, understanding and faithful in awakening another’s love”
 “True love knows no obstacles, no challenges, no faults and is always forgiving and forgetting…”
 “Give your heart to only one, but your smile to all.”
This should be expected between husband and wife partnerships. Nurturing and maintaining a relationship requires skills. It is very important that people remain loyal to each other. It is a comforting feeling that the presence of children always strengthens the relationship between parents.
The choice made in marriage should not be regretted. It has been fated that the two come together to produce new offspring.. Marriage is not about buying a suit and when you get tired of it, throw it away and buy a new one. If you have made a promise or a choice, never regret it. It is a decision made to last or else this world is in chaos.
Knowing that a suit can fade and tear, it’s the same for all ladies and gentlemen. No one stays 18 forever, and no one is wise enough to make the perfect choice with a crush. Love isn’t built on beds of roses, it isn’t all milk and honey…or forever darling, agreed? The coming together of two people from two different worlds has to face many realities of life when they start living together.
 “Tolerance, patience, persistence, interdependence, trust, confidence, openness, win/win situations are qualities that can build a relationship, and the question is, ‘Are you ready to make it work?’
My mentor used to joke… in this love story, it always starts from a stranger to a friend and then to a lover, but after marriage it becomes the opposite. Now it comes from lovers, cold friends, then strangers… eventually leads to breakups. Why is it always like this? What has gone wrong? When the other is in love, each can sacrifice almost anything to win the other’s love, but now it’s just the opposite.
Similarity breeds resentment? Demented? Did you find something? Don’t want to move? Too sophisticated? Stalled/stale relationship? Language barrier? A body barrier? Is anyone behind? Discrimination? Too attached? Too much addiction? No money, no talk? Is there anyone sexier? 3rd party? love problems? Health problems? Lack of sexual desire? No comfort? Too unresponsive? Too naive? No electricity? His faults? His bad temper? No brains? the lists are too long to write…
I have come across many emotionally distressed women and I have never dared to talk about their failure in love life and family, love fading, being betrayed, being waved off, being left cold, missing out on the other. mistress, losing interest in sex life and poor health. Most of these women were suffering in silence and seemed to be hoarding all these negative things in their hearts and minds. These women are sometimes so stressed that they release their anger towards their own children. Just imagine physically hurting or making hurtful remarks to young children, their own children, and regretting it later. We call it child abuse, this is not a new thing, is it?
How many more pitiful sights must be heard or seen? How distressing is it to see these women provoked and unable to control their anger and rage? The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world, Did you hear this phrase? Young people are indirectly influenced by bad character and are treated badly with insulting, rude and meaningless words. This is why the morals of the modern world have been corrupted by the wrong upbringing of distressed mothers and maids or amahs with whom their children have grown up. Instead of their own mothers, they grow up with Indonesian maids or amahs, and eventually they talk and think as one…
The emotional balance of a wife or mother is too important in structuring or influencing the next generations. So it comes back to a happy family where the parents should be on good terms with each other. Parents should set good examples and lead the way to true happiness. Separations or divorces are too hurtful for everyone involved.
 Treat this relationship as a journey instead of a destination…. We all start out as strangers who blossom into friends, then lovers, then parents, grandparents and even lying side by side cold and lifeless…….partners for this life and eternity. Have you ever thought about it? It has been fatal, as I said.
I met an old wise man who told me this. “Husband and wife are one life!” This single sentence awakens in me a reality, an understanding that I never thought I had. This awakening becomes my answer to my problems… I came to understand that ‘his is also mine, mine is also his…’, his problems are also mine, his wrongs or rights are also mine. There is no escape. Never think fair or unfair….
 Yes, there is no escaping fair or unfair, or who does the lion’s share of the work or whatever….. Another wise old man also told me that if someone demands justice in this matter you love me, then I love you, you give, so I give ; you work so I work…..there will never be peace. Where is the JUSTICE? The law cannot be applied to “equal rights for men or women!” The more you fight, the more it causes… the more suffering there will be…
This love between husband and wife is selfish love, but without it, chaos ensues. Perfect love between spouses is proven when and where no third party can intrude between them. Imperfect love allows a third party to interrupt or is that an excuse for some? .
 The power of love and sex should never be underestimated. It has moved mountains and created a history of countless triumphs and failures. Many heroes still fall at the feet of beauties, losing fame, families and failing in their mission. Too many heroes and heroines are attracted by outer beauty, not inner beauty. Too many heroes and heroines wanted to be lured into the fantasies and wonders of forbidden love. Forbidden fruits are too delicious to avoid. What can we do? Samson, the strongest man, also fell into ruins. He repented and said. “The sensual pleasure of the night is not worth a life sentence and death was the punishment!” It wasn’t just a story.
Who are we to say they are wrong? Who are we to say they shouldn’t or can’t do this or that? But it is written in the 10 commandments that we are not to commit adultery. Not only the Bible, but also wise teachings. A fixed marriage is only fixed when both partners agree to keep it as an eternal bond, otherwise it is too easy to break up. And how many people are really willing to work hard to save a marriage? How many are patient enough to wait for another love to awaken?
 Remember that all people have weaknesses. To err is human, to forgive is divine. To make mistakes or not to make mistakes… sometimes this passion or love is too complicated to explain or express. Efforts to dissolve or detach from a relationship or forbidden love require tremendous willpower and determination… but for the sake of family happiness and togetherness, all problems should be resolved. For LOVE, children and our parents too…..
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