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Parenting Middle School Children: 3 Little Known Reasons Why Your Child Misbehaves

Parenting middle school-aged children is in a way like a close encounter with an alien species: suddenly a calm, collected and quite sensitive to parental intervention child is an expert imitating the Clump, and the next a raging tiger.

Of course, as parents we know to expect this, but somehow I think most of us get caught in the rain because of this. Hopeful thinking? Perhaps.

It’s not that we don’t want our kids to grow up to be happy, successful adults who can handle pretty much anything the world throws at them—it’s more like we wish we could skip the veggies and cut right into dessert.

For those of you who prefer to eat green beans before chocolate mousse pie, here are some tips to help you understand why that ugly stranger in your child’s bedroom sometimes acts the way he does:

1) Lack of sleep

Teenagers are fantastic at the great denial: the insistence that they are not tired and that they have too much to do anyway to even consider sleeping. However, the reality is that teenagers grow up fast. Both boys and girls can increase their height by 8-9 cm per year. Throw in more muscle mass, bone density, and a general surge in hormones, and you’ve got one hell of a rock soup.

All this growth means teenagers need a lot of sleep – at least 9.5 hours a night. Since studies show that the average teen only sleeps about 7.4 hours a night, you can probably guess the result: a cranky, rude teen who acts a lot like they did when they were three and needed a good nap before they became human again. .

If you do the math, you can easily see that a teenager who gets up for school at 6:00 a.m. needs to be in bed by 9:00 p.m. to get the right amount of sleep. Unfortunately, studies show that many teenagers can’t fall asleep that early because their brains aren’t ready for sleep.

You can help your teen get the sleep he needs by encouraging a regular bedtime (the body can’t easily make up for missed sleep), encouraging your teen to participate in some form of exercise during the day, and eliminating caffeine.

2) Hunger

As a parent of a teenager, you may have noticed the rapid disappearance of food from your house, so hunger is not usually on your list of reasons why teenagers can get out of control. Unfortunately, growing teenagers really need a lot of extra energy for your food budget. In addition, it is quite common for teenagers to eat junk food or fast food, depriving their bodies of the protein they need for long-term energy.

You can help your teen by offering low-fat, high-energy protein snacks like peanut butter, beef patties, cottage cheese and fruit, tuna, protein bars, and believe it or not, oatmeal.

3) Time with you

It may seem hard to imagine, but a teenager really wants to spend time with you. Most teenagers want a relationship with their parents; they are much like toddlers who want to be independent but reserve the right to monopolize your attention.

If you look back at your teenage years and realize that most of your interactions were along the lines of “do you ever take out the trash” or “turn the music down – none of us want to go deaf,” you may want to take some time off to spend quality time with your teen.

Sometimes teenagers are wary of spending time with their parents because they imagine it’s just a cover for the “big talk.” So you don’t have to plan a night out on the town if that adds to your teenagers. Instead, try to be completely “in the know” when your teen comes home or sits down at the table with you.

It’s easy to get so focused on online stalking that we forget about the people in front of us.

Instead, put away your iPod, Blackberry. Turn off the TV and put your computer to sleep. Instead, try something new and old-fashioned: Talk to your kids. You might be surprised by what they have to say.

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